Go To Sleep, Little Baby
Helpfully, May Blossom and Pipsqueak look like twins born four years apart, so I can illustrate this post with a picture of my own child...
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JESSICA DETTMANN
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jdettmann
Jan 15, 20143 min read
When You Think He’s Fast Asleep, He’s Always Wide Awake
Why the italics, you might ask. What has Gusto done to merit that? Nothing. Gusto is being an exemplary feline. It is the jellicle cats...
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jdettmann
Dec 12, 20133 min read
Flat-packed
So sweet, you’d never know they have tiny ear canals brimming with filth and germs. Nor that the one on the right is about to throw up in...
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jdettmann
Oct 22, 20133 min read
Nearly Three Years In
Tomorrow is May Blossom’s third birthday. If you’d asked me three years ago what I thought my life might look like now, I would have...
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jdettmann
Sep 20, 20133 min read
Things Are Good When Things Are Good
Thing 1: Since one or other or another of his or my recent colds or ear infections or other random maladies that have blurred into one...
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jdettmann
Aug 24, 20133 min read
Upstairs Downstairs
The state of the carpet on the stairs is too shameful to photograph, so here’s a picture of Garnet in a massive hat instead. Our new...
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jdettmann
Aug 9, 20133 min read
In The House
Remember when I used to write things on this blog? Those were the days, eh? Well, those days might be returning. Things are finally,...
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jdettmann
May 22, 20132 min read
True Romance
Because I want this to remain a mummy blog, and not morph into a beauty blog, I shall refrain from giving you the contact details of the...
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jdettmann
May 14, 20134 min read
Missing, In Action
‘It means he’s sad,’ I told her. ‘It’s a metaphor. Why do you think he’s sad?’ ‘I think it’s because he misses his mummy and his sister...
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jdettmann
Mar 25, 20134 min read
The Real Boss
Come the week of the concert and my mum, who had bravely offered to babysit both May Blossom and Garnet, politely asked how we were going...
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jdettmann
Mar 8, 20134 min read
Make ‘Em Laugh
May Blossom at work in her office. A month or so ago we let May Blossom watch Singin’ In the Rain. We were on the hunt for a movie that...
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jdettmann
Jan 16, 20133 min read
A Month
Garnet has one elf ear. The other is a human ear. We are unsure what, if anything, to make of this. Garnet’s 24 days old. It’s been a bit...
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jdettmann
Dec 25, 20122 min read
This Is Just To Say
Our little boy was born ten days ago. Sorry it’s taken me so long to put him down and write a post to announce it. But if you smelled his...
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jdettmann
Nov 29, 20122 min read
Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life
An optimist is one who happily rides her friend’s bike with no pants on. I am a pessimist. I specialise in negative visualisation. Much...
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jdettmann
Nov 23, 20123 min read
Car Seat Shopping For The Hormonally Deranged
One of the many dangerous roads of the world that are all out to get my children, according to my pregnancy-addled brain. Have you ever...
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jdettmann
Nov 5, 20123 min read
Baby You Can’t Drive In My Car
Let’s just get this, in a six-seater version with loads of airbags. We need to get a new car. I find this simultaneously a very boring...
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jdettmann
Aug 28, 20124 min read
The Crying Game
One of the many stunning gender-neutral outfits May Blossom will be handing down to her sibling. According to the medical establishment I...
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jdettmann
Jul 3, 20123 min read
1-2-3-4 Tell Me That You Love Me More
This pregnancy I have been plagued with insomnia, which is not something I have ever experienced before. I was the kid who could fall...
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jdettmann
Jun 5, 20123 min read
Great Expectations
Here’s a blurry picture of the creature to be known henceforth as NB. Those are the initials of its in utero name, but could equally...
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jdettmann
May 9, 20125 min read
Crying Over Spilt Milk
That sort of casual attitude is exactly how I did NOT approach breastfeeding. I approached it with a delightful cocktail of fear,...
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