#Life

jdettmann

May 15, 20174 min read

Hashtag Mother’s Day

Just before dawn yesterday I had one of those very special nightmares where you wake, unable to breathe from the horror, saying to...

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jdettmann

Mar 29, 20173 min read

Jackhammers, Interrupted

I, sadly not a celestial being, had to remain here on the earth that quaked every day for eight or nine hours as the diggers ripped...

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jdettmann

Mar 21, 20173 min read

I Am A Lego Detective

But I’m confused, because although I think that’s what I said, what he seems to have heard is, ‘I am a Lego Detective. I can find any...

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jdettmann

Feb 14, 20173 min read

Romance Club

In the past I have been very bad at giving Valentine’s Day gifts to H, which is a great shame because he is far more romantic than I am...

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TWELVE Days of Christmas? Not On My Watch

jdettmann

Jan 12, 20173 min read

TWELVE Days of Christmas? Not On My Watch

Proper homemade gingerbread house that I had absolutely nothing to do with. Grandmothers are where it’s at. Good New Year to you, dear...

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jdettmann

Dec 3, 20164 min read

Yule Be Sorry

I don’t quite know what it is about December that makes me so down in the dumps every year, except oh yes, maybe I do. Maybe it’s the way...

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jdettmann

Nov 18, 20164 min read

Should It Stay Or Should It Go?

I need to cull our belongings. This is a truth universally known. But I am also a sentimentalist at heart. I know how you’re meant to get...

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Things Are Gonna Slide, Slide In All Directions

jdettmann

Nov 11, 20164 min read

Things Are Gonna Slide, Slide In All Directions

Here instead is a list, which will show you how deeply embedded in my life is the music and lyrics of Leonard Cohen. Leonard Cohen Song...

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jdettmann

Oct 10, 20163 min read

Pining For The Fjords

I’m doing that thing I always do when I come back from new and wonderful, and I try to transport the lifestyle. When H and I went to...

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jdettmann

Sep 8, 20163 min read

Psycho Killer: Qu’est-ce que c’est?

And well might you ask, Talking Heads, well might you ask. Is a psycho killer a killer of psychos, or a psycho who kills? It’s a crucial...

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jdettmann

Aug 11, 20163 min read

Olympics Para Siempre

We are disgraceful: this was one of only two photos we have of anyone in this family doing anything even vaguely athletic, while also not...

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In The End, It Was The Odd Socks That Finished Her Off

jdettmann

Jul 20, 20164 min read

In The End, It Was The Odd Socks That Finished Her Off

Garnet searching for his socks. We’ve been on a holiday. A driving holiday, and while I’ll try to write about that soon, and tell you all...

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jdettmann

Jun 29, 20163 min read

It Turns Out, You Can Go Home Again

Sample bookshelf from my parents’ attic: Just one of the many collections of books that tells you probably more than you need to know...

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jdettmann

May 25, 20163 min read

Yellow But Not Yellow

Here’s how it goes: the kids catch a cold from school or kindy or licking a parking meter, they spend four or five days being snotty and...

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jdettmann

Mar 29, 20163 min read

The Longest Weekend

Poor little kid. She and her brother are so prone to ear infections and croup. They just have tiny little respiratory tracts and...

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jdettmann

Mar 23, 20163 min read

A Hot Cross Son for Easter

This week he has been brought to howling tears by many and varied injustices. There was the fact that I would not go under the house to...

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jdettmann

Mar 16, 20164 min read

Testing Times

Occasionally he makes up a word (‘You nuckus!’) or just pops something that’s not an insult at all (‘You big sandwich!) None of it is...

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jdettmann

Mar 8, 20163 min read

Good Spider, Bad Spider

Dumbledore (left) and Huntsman Who Did Not Heed Me (right) Sydney’s in the middle of a plague of spiders. Summer forgot to end and for...

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jdettmann

Mar 1, 20163 min read

Tropical with No Chance of Orang-utans

How I cope with this is to put aside what I should be doing (perhaps preparing my keynote speech for the International Conference on...

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I Wandered Lonely As A Cloud Whose Kids Are Both At School

jdettmann

Feb 15, 20163 min read

I Wandered Lonely As A Cloud Whose Kids Are Both At School

Garnet’s preschool curriculum focuses on how to induce guilt. The slow process of settling the kids into school and preschool continues...

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