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JESSICA DETTMANN
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jdettmann
Nov 2, 20152 min read
Question Time
One morning – bloody early one morning – he asked me the following questions in the space of half an hour, which is how long it takes to...
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jdettmann
Apr 15, 20152 min read
How Funny? Pants-Off Funny
Benny Hill is a cultural reference that is on its last legs, I’d say. I only recall it vaguely from my childhood, mostly because it...
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jdettmann
Dec 8, 20143 min read
Christmas Is Coming And There Is Nothing You Or I Can Do To Stop It
Well, I say not much, but I guess there have been some fairly important milestones for other people around here. Garnet has learned to...
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jdettmann
Aug 8, 20143 min read
The Son Also Vomits
My daughter has a remarkable grasp of phonetic spelling. This week has indeed been totally phykd. Gastro. Again. You’re going to start...
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jdettmann
May 27, 20142 min read
Cross
It took half an hour to even upload this far-too-small image, due to iPhoto (or iFighto as my Dad has long called it) deciding that...
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jdettmann
Mar 5, 20142 min read
Games for Rainy Days
Others are more prosaic. Take ‘Molly Drops Her Phone’. In this game, May Blossom is Molly. Molly takes my phone, puts it in her handbag...
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jdettmann
Oct 22, 20133 min read
Nearly Three Years In
Tomorrow is May Blossom’s third birthday. If you’d asked me three years ago what I thought my life might look like now, I would have...
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jdettmann
Sep 20, 20133 min read
Things Are Good When Things Are Good
Thing 1: Since one or other or another of his or my recent colds or ear infections or other random maladies that have blurred into one...
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jdettmann
Aug 28, 20132 min read
What’s Mine Is Mine and What’s Yours Is Mine Too
Every Tuesday, she will go to a fantastic home daycare, which is, happily, run by my parents’ neighbour. She will be one of five small...
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jdettmann
Aug 24, 20133 min read
Upstairs Downstairs
The state of the carpet on the stairs is too shameful to photograph, so here’s a picture of Garnet in a massive hat instead. Our new...
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jdettmann
May 14, 20134 min read
Missing, In Action
‘It means he’s sad,’ I told her. ‘It’s a metaphor. Why do you think he’s sad?’ ‘I think it’s because he misses his mummy and his sister...
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jdettmann
Apr 19, 20133 min read
The Games We Play: Angry Men Edition
I spent a bit of time on that flight in the galley, bobbing around while getting Garnet off to sleep, and so I was privy to the pursed...
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jdettmann
Nov 28, 20123 min read
My Patience Is The Only Thin Part Of Me
But, weirdly enough, it was one of the loveliest nights I can remember. Partly because nights in general, in my opinion, are for sleeping...
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jdettmann
Nov 23, 20123 min read
Car Seat Shopping For The Hormonally Deranged
One of the many dangerous roads of the world that are all out to get my children, according to my pregnancy-addled brain. Have you ever...
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jdettmann
Nov 21, 20121 min read
The Cat’s Pyjamas
To celebrate my first ever blog post written on an iPhone in the bath, here’s a picture of May Blossom cuddling Gusto, who is wearing May...
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jdettmann
Nov 19, 20122 min read
If You Can’t Say Something Nice…
Today nearly slipped by without a blog. Today was hard. Physically I feel like crap right now and trying to be funny feels forced. So...
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jdettmann
Nov 16, 20121 min read
Ages Two And Up
Are you aged two (and up)? Are you bored? Have you got no-one to play with but your own shadow? Try some of the new games May Blossom has...
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jdettmann
Nov 15, 20122 min read
It Doesn’t Touch The Mango
Which of the two following stories is scarier? Thing 1. This week I saw a new physiotherapist. She told me I should wear what can only be...
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jdettmann
Nov 14, 20121 min read
This Is What You Get When You Mess With Us
I think we all feel like this today. Because of the wonders of Facebook, I know, for certain, that everyone else in the civilised world...
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jdettmann
Nov 13, 20123 min read
Children’s Parties for the Back-yardless
Invitations: To get the numbers up, it’s useful invite people to your party. I used Paperless Post for electronic invitations. It is...
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